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What I've Learned From MusicWhat I've Learned From Popular Music

-Anyone can make it whether or not they have actual talent as long as enough people think they're good looking

-A female singer's talent is directly correlated to the amount of bare skin exposed in her album covers and concert performances

-If you can act, you can sing, regardless of how much vocal training you've had

-If you're rich, you can sing, regardless of how much vocal training you've had

-If an artist writes their own lyrics and/or music, they are instantly original and amazing no matter how bland and generic it is or how much it sucks

-Auto Tune is your friend. Who wants to hear what a REAL

What I've Learned From TVWhat I've Learned From Crime Dramas

-Female law enforcement workers always have time to make themselves up

-Male law enforcement workers always have time to work out and mousse their hair

-Both genders have enough pay to afford designer labels, sweet cars, and fine, furnished households

-And have enough time to keep them immaculate

-They all have giant chips on their shoulders that interfere greatly with their professional conduct yet this is accepted

-They probably also have missing family members and children they didn't know about

-The law enforcement agencies have enormous budgets to spend on borderline futuristic-looking buildings

Stephenie Meyer Sucks Part 2I got Breaking Dawn on the day that it came out and was hoping that Meyer would somehow redeem the steadily deteriorating quality of the Twilight series. What a huge disappointment. I was even more disappointed when I found out how Meyer was responding to the criticism towards it. Then I discovered that she was writing Midnight Sun. I looked forward to that because, even though all of the books suck, they are a guilty pleasure and Twilight was the best of all of them. Then she stopped writing it! So, here I am, complaining about how these incidents are further proof of Meyer's suckage.

Breaking Dawn turned many Twilighters anti. A lot of the

Me against the modern world 1SHUTTER SHADES

Sunglasses?....SUNGLASSES??, who needs sunglasses when you can have shutter shades?, the most rediculous, most pointlessly inane, blatantly moronic things ever to discrace the name of Accessory since croc shoes!, ok let us first talk about the background, ....they're initially for girls under the age of 14, created by the god awful kanye west (who i now hate even more for bringing out this moronic trash), but what suprises me is that boys/men wear them....wow!....great way to show off your sexual confusion!

Secondly is the name "shutter shades", now im not from the planet uranus so please correct me if the following definitio

Choose your own feminism

Ladies, we need to do something. The f-word is definitely going out of fashion.
No? You don't think it's true? All the experts are saying so.
Just look at the stack of style magazines in the supermarket. Skim through their sultry pages. Gaze into the eyes of all those heroine-sheik waifs and realize what message they are trying to whisper through their smug, smiling, emaciated lips:
Feminism is out. Objectification is in.
After learning something as awful as that, it's expected that you'll feel a little tired. So don't feel bad about asking the bagger to help you out with your cart. In fact, sit down, take a brea

The Attack of Mary-SueHello, there.

My name is Mary-Sue, and I am better than you. I am better than everyone, actually. Arrogance? You know it's true. And, I roam. I find refuge in a type of fandom literature known as fanfiction. A warning, though, when I enter fanfiction, l will always be the best character, whether you like it or not. I will always be the kindest, the smartest, the most beautiful, and the strongest in the fanfiction. I will always have the longest hair, I will always have the most jewelry, and I will always have an admirable personality, even if I am arrogant, adamant, and ignorant. And don't expect my personality to change, either.

ABCs of EmoA is for Angst. And Art. Especially Anime Art. You must love it. All emo children love anime.
B is for Blood. The gift of life? Please! It is your curse.
C is for Crying. All those tears that you've wasted; just think about it. C is also for Cutting. For those who cry tears of blood - apparently.
D is for Death. What all good emo children wish for.
E is for Eternity. The amount of time it takes you to get out of this hell into one that never ends.
F is for Feelings. You know there are only two. Sadness and anger. Nobody understands you. Love is a lie. Happiness is an illusion. Oh, how depressing and worthless everything is...
G is for G

My Rules for Fan FictionWho am I? I'm no one. In the world of writing, I'm nobody. I'm not professional, I have no authority to speak of. So you need not concern yourself with my opinion on your writing.

That said, if you want your fan fiction to get positive feedback, you'll have to keep your audience in mind. These are just a few standards I (a zero) hold fan fiction to. Some things you may want to avoid or capitalize on, when writing.

Rule 1: Canon - The Golden Rule:
If someone or something is wildly out of place and this is not done correctly, it's non-canon and at worst is a fan fiction of a certain series in name only. If it's a humor fic or something like

How to Create a Mary-Sue Creating and writing about original and provocative characters can sometimes be a hassle, but there is a simple and elegant solution to this problem: Create a Mary-Sue. Everyone loves Mary-Sues! They are perfect, wonderful, charming, adorable, and fabulous characters. They cannot be tethered down by the flaws of your average person! Best of all, they are simple to create! Firstly, drop all the formal ideas of character creation, specifically any notion that imperfection makes for compelling and interesting characters; they won’t be needed. Next, create a personality for the Sue. If they are going into previously made plot, with already

Stephenie Meyer Sucks Part 1Ah, yes, Stephenie Meyer, author of the Twilight series. My opinion of her, from the way that she has presented herself to the public in interviews and such, is that she is a whiny, self absorbed woman with the mind of a 13 year old. She can't deal with criticism because it hurts her delicate little feelings, and believes that she is an amazing writer and that her story and characters are somehow superior to those seen in the works of people such as Jane Austen and William Shakespeare. Here's one statement that shows that she is both infantile and unable to handle criticism:

"I will state, for the record, that my queries truly sucked, and I

Why Miley Cyrus Freakin SUCKSMiley Cyrus. Disney's biggest star since Hilary Duff. Why is she so annoying?
Oh…well I don't know….lets see hmm…

1. She brought back plaid.

For that alone she should be thrown in jail. Plaid is fashionable for lumber jacks. I don't take fashion advice from sweaty dirty men who haul wood thankyouverymuch. Bringing something into style that is as ugly as plaid is a criminal offence for which she needs to be punished. Because you just KNOW the redneck white trash girls are just SHITTING themselves over this. It's like they found a kindred spirit or something. I can't wait for the camouflage. Because when that day comes, I'll

How To ArgueIf there's one thing that a person can't live without, it's arguments. Whether it's online or real life, chances are you're going to get sucked into them. Like the death of a pet or every ongoing anime series since the mid nineties tanking horribly and hitting rock bottom, it's inevitable. So here are yet a few more tips to help you succeed in that key aspect of life (and online).

1. Name Calling Dropping Something that you're bound to see in almost every other argument in life is the ever-present name-calling. Fuck key points or backing up your retorts with actual intelligence. None of that is necessary when you have name-calling. Name call

Ode to the Wildernessi knew that evar since i was borned i was a little diffrnt from everybudy else. no one understands what im going through.
it all started when i started having this dream where i dreamt i was in a pack runnin wif otehr wolves and i was da leader. after that, everyfing changed. after that I saw the signs.
like i was rly good with dogs and stuff and all the dogs i meet get along wif me rly well. like my neighbor's poodle likes me more than she likes her owner. and this one tiem my dentist told me dat my teeth were longer than they should be.
if that's not a sign then i dont kno wut is.
i dont get along well wif other people because they mak

What I've Learned From RpingWhat I've Learned From Roleplayers

-You don't need to bother with grammar, spelling, or punctuation

-Nor do you need to have any idea of sentence structure at all

-Always use one liners (one sentence posts) and use emoticons to show your characters emotions. And instead of describing the actions your character does, in well constructed "looks like you stayed in school past the 1st grade" sentences, use asterisks! Example: *defeats demons with one hit kill*

-Fandom rps are way better than any other type because they come with a pre-made setting. Being creative is haaaaaard.

-You don't need to modify your character to fit a setting they do

At The BottomThere is no constant bottom member in a wolf pack.

Scent-bitter-warning did not know this. He was at the floundering bottom, with never enough food, never enough space, and never enough anything. Except aggression. There was plenty of that directed towards him.

A she-wolf had found the young boy as a toddler and taken him in. He ate food from her like his adoptive siblings, and lay in one big tussled heap with them. Once the pack had taken his scent in, it was promptly forgotten that he was adopted and not a wolf- if even one of them made note of that in the first place. As a result, wolf standards were set for him. He had to do like his si

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What I've Learned From Yaoi

by *linawifeofL, Aug 14, 2010, 12:19:47 PM
Literature / Prose / Non-Fiction / Reviews & Guides

What I've Learned From Yaoi Fans

-Gay men are born with a special gene that prevents them from growing hair anywhere other than on their heads

-They only come in two varieties: sexy manly or girl-boy and they can only be with the opposite of what they themselves are

-All girl-boys are either naïve, overly-emotional and innocent or sultry temptresses

-And all sexy manlies are brooding, worldly, and probably sadistic

-The sexy-manly is the dominant and the girl-boy is the submissive. IN NO WAY CAN THIS RULE BE TAMPERED WITH

-All men are gay. Some just don't realize it

-Coming out is never an issue because there is no homophobia in Yaoi World. And like I just said, all men are gay anyway

-There are places in the world where there are no women. Only men. And they're all gay

-If there are women, they're either the girl-boy's bff or some bitch who is trying to break them up

-If two men are gay, they WILL fall in love with each other

-Or at least have sex

-Sexy manlies may make other men have sex with them even if they don't want to, but it's not rape, it's surprise sex they didn't know they wanted

-And it usually ends with TWU LURV

-If two gay men are together, they have had sex

-And they love having sex

-All the time

-Because all gay men ever do is have sex with each other all day long

-And if they're not having sex, they're thinking about having sex

-Even if they do normal couple things like kiss and go out, it always starts and ends with lots and lots of fucking

-Gay men are sexually attracted to every other gay man they meet

-Things like dating and developing a relationship are so overrated. JUST START FUCKING

-Gay men are always young and attractive. If they are old and/or unattractive, they're a rapist

-If a gay man wants to get with a straight man, he "realizes" that he is gay by the end of the story

-And if he's ever been in love with/had sex with a woman before, it was a mistake

-Lube is not necessary for totally awesome non-painful sex

-And even if the uke cries he still likes it

What I've Learned From Yaoiby *linawifeofL

Literature / Prose / Non-Fiction / Reviews & Guides

I think I've started a series.

Anything else needed?

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~GreekPrincess143 Nov 25, 2012 Hobbyist Digital Artist

Hahaha omg so true

~Kaptain-Kefiah Oct 9, 2012 Hobbyist Traditional Artist

you forgot 'gay sex ALWAYS involves anal. ALWAYS'.

~midsneypixels May 13, 2012 Hobbyist Digital Artist

"there is no homophobia in yaoi world" I know, right? you'd think people would use a lot of it! "forbidden love" and all that, makes it more intersting! GYAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

~reality-escapist15 Jan 28, 2012 Professional Writer

Oh~ Come on... Sometimes cliche's are fun xD
If you want real guy-guy romance, you've got to watch shounenai.

~KawaiiSpy Dec 15, 2011

Sweet jesus, I want to make this into a stamp.

~charmsheart0559 Sep 2, 2011 Writer

*sigh *
stereotypes are a fanservice, even when they aren't in writing but out there in the real world,
then they're just a different kind of (uneducated) fanservice...which really just means letting people
continue to be ignorant.

Thank you for these
it made my day

~Ep1cShad0w Aug 19, 2011

I seriusly need to make one of these "What I'v learned" things. I've got a fairly good list made for TV shows and movies.

~Arte-the-CatBoy Aug 5, 2011

As a gay guy I love this. So very much. 8D

*SoulfulInsanity Jun 18, 2011 Student Traditional Artist

I'm a yaoi fan, and yeah, there are a lot of pretty lame-ass stereotypes in the genre XD Makes me glad I usually try to avoid 'em, even though a few of my characters have lame-ass tendencies.
I will say one thing, though. The lack of body-hair thing? Could very well be a case of what the artist likes/wants to draw. For instance, I hate drawing body hair, other then the usual snail-trail and pubic hair. But I don't not draw it because it makes them "pretty" expect in a few cases where the character really is pretty damn hairless or real feminine in the case of a particular family- and this isn't just a stereotype thing, I've seen naturally hairless guys before XD So really, that one point (and really only that one) I consider an artistic choice and not actual a stereotype. A lot of mainstream manga/anime have hairless straight guys too, for instance.

~SilverShadow1711 Jun 2, 2011

This. My god, THIS forever!

heh, I love that people who draw and/or write yaoi have obviously never seen real gay men have sex. Seriously, if you go to ANY (well, MOST) gay porn site, most of the men are old, fat and RIDICULOUSLY hairy (unless the site is devoted to twink. Which all gay men are) and it isn't nearly as pretty and sparkly as fanfiction dictates.

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